party time
Sunday, Aug. 24, 2003 - 5:18 p.m.
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Justin and I just got home from a family gathering-type function at my grandparents� house. It was your usual forced conversation bullshit kinda stuff with the exception of my grandparents, sister, great aunt, and great uncle. Some NOT highlights from today�s festivities include, but are not limited to, the following two stories I�m about to share: 1. Let me preface this one by saying that my dad thinks he�s funny and is considered, by most, to be the �class clown� of the family. He recently acquired a new key chain (despite the fact that the page from that link isn�t in English I�m pretty sure the item is self-explanatory) and tossed it to my husband (other witnesses to this event include my mother and 2nd cousin) to show it off. Justin played along to humor my dad by pushing the button. Over the sounds of the worse faked orgasm ever my dad says to my husband, �you ever heard that before?� And my husband, thinking he meant the key chain, said, �no� to which my dad replied, �didn�t think so!� and proceeded to roar with laughter. Now from anyone else this would have just been lame humor but from my dad? In reference to me? About MY orgasms? Positively awful! I don�t want my dad to think about my sex life in even the most remote or abstract way � that�s just disturbing. 2. Another dad moment here...out of nowhere and in front of my mom, sister, and three other relatives the following conversation took place between me and my dad: Him: you should cover that... Me: (confused) what? Him: cover that... Me: cover WHAT? Him: (to my mom) she never wore clothes like that when she lived in our house... Me: if you don�t like my shirt, don�t look at it... Him: I wasn�t talking about the shirt, the shirt is fine... Me: (insert gross feelings of knowing that her dad noticed her breasts enough to say something outloud) Seriously, how disturbing! And the shirt wasn�t even a �bad� shirt! Just a normal fitted v-neckity thingy � granted there was a slight hint of visible cleavage but nothing I felt was inappropriate for a family gathering. Normally these family thingies only happen once or twice a year but we have to do this all again next weekend already because Saturday is the second (and much larger) wedding reception for me and Justin (a.k.a. my mom�s party from hell)...I�m thinking of going topless... |